all humans make mistakes....big ones and small....but i may have made the wrlds first ever crucial mistak...i use to be dumb..quick to jump the gun n never really thought past the day it was....n i though there was nothing wrong with that n i was completley happy...bu tthen i met you....n though i had met you months b4..i has just gottin introduced to "YOU" for the first time...i felt thngs i never could describe...i thought i was happy b4 but i found my self enfactuated with u...ur eyes..your lips...your touch..n your presence...i would go to your house or ur neighborhood hoping to see u...n if i didnt then i wasnt even satisfied... n i though to myself am i in love? or am i getting ahead of myself?and i ignored the lessons that you tried to teach to me time n time again...n i didnt thnk past the day not knowing what i was doing in retrospect....and so i not only let you walk..but i pushed you away...not knowing it was somthing i would never be able to replace....not knowing the amount of pain that i would later have to endear to this day...n i thought maybe sometime down the road you'll alwaiz be thea...sucha fool..im not a bad person but for the things i put u through i feel like im up thea with hitler...cuzz i hurt sum1 who loved me dearly n woulda done ne thng for me...n i loved you n i still do...n i had a bbad way of showing it...basically i ddint sho it to much at all...prolyl cuzz i was dumb n not cuzz i was afraid to get hurt but blind to the fact i was hurting you...n days went on n i would thnk about you..n u would be in my dreams..and my thought during school..i would lose focus at time cuzz i would thnk of you soo hard...w/o even trying....you had other bf's that came n left...idk if cuzz thngs just wasnt right or they just fucked up...i remember breakin an ankle n i didint even have to touch ne1...i realized i wasnt the best in the wrld for you...n u knew that but u loved me ne ways..but i didint kno that n gave up somthingwith soem1 that means the world to me...n when i did it was to late...but i made changes..i finally grew up n stopped thnkin for only the day n saw what you ssaw...bu tagin ti was too late..n i came oh soo far..just to show you..cuzz in the end u was alwaiz one of the few opinions that matter to me...n sure i kno now it seems liek bullshyt especially with my away..n granted i did meet sum1 who i did care for alot..n i fought with myself n i turnedit all down...i declined beeing with her...cuzz i sat back on it al n i looked real deep inside n asked myslef is she really liek you..n i looked back to what we went through n what me n her went through..n thea is no comparison....we been through the bullshyt n a half... we been through alotta thngs n grew togehter..n even when we faded apart..everytime we see each other its liek we dnt miss a beat...i wont sya srry for what i did...cuzz i've said enough sorrys..n its lost its meaning...n i kno you prolly wil have a hard time beliveing everythgn u just read...but this is all coming form the heart..n i still wish to this day i could juss show u ..that thngs are soo much different...i couldnt ask for ne1 better then youcuzz there isnt..believe it or not babe i love you to death...n ne thng you need i would be the first to give it to u..weather it be an appendix or a kidney an arm or a leg..w.e u need..i put that on me n u..idk if ur gonna forgive me or if u believe what im tellin u...i hope you do..cuzz if not then you would be makin the same mistake i made soo long ago...i've come so long of away n its been a long ass trip...but even ask ur sister..cuzz ion thnk theas a dy she ever belved that me n u wasnt meant..sh ebe cheering for us since day 1..dass y she my nigg..n i thnk she see's that i mean what i say n that somthing is different about me ...thnks for reading hope u conider it take care babe